When Change Found Me…

People who know me will tell you that I’m a very private person. I value my space and don’t share personal matters easily. But since my business and life partner Phil and I have set up our business, The Change Lounge, I have been reflecting a lot about this concept of feeling stuck and the importance of sharing my experience. I know our aim is to help people get unstuck and move forward with purpose, but it struck me that my sledgehammer moment of stuckness hit me when I was 30! Of course, I had many instances leading up to this, but this was a pivotal shock.

Everything was technically going well for me. I had a fabulous job that I loved and was making a difference. It was my dream job until it wasn’t. I didn’t realise at the time that I was burnt out, lost, unhappy and completely lacking in imagination and fulfillment. I just felt like “is this as good as it gets”, “I can’t keep doing this”. I was well and truly stuck, with no way out. I couldn’t breathe. Inertia crept in and I felt fearful about the future and making a change. It was the midlife existential question that I was avoiding, what am I going to do with my life?

I wandered around in denial and self-censorship, ignoring my inner voice until that voice started screaming saying, “I can’t stand feeling stagnant any longer”. That’s when I made a big decision to leave my job, with no job to step into and instead to pursue a liberating road of freedom. I didn’t factor in the scary uncertainty, difficulty and imposter syndrome that came with this choice.

I knew I had to take charge and re-invent myself. More of the ‘same old’ was no longer serving me. I had to pick myself up and seek assistance. I enlisted the guidance of a career coach. It was a defining, albeit vulnerable moment for me. That support empowered me to learn valuable lessons that made my journey easier. I discovered that:

• It’s ok to feel stuck. It is bound to happen at some point or even several times throughout life. The world is not going to cave in and I will get through it. As the renown philosopher Eckhart Tolle says, “this too will pass”.

• Change is really hard. I’m not going to sugar-coat it. I didn’t feel especially brave. In fact, self-doubt infiltrated my mind and set up residence. Moving out of my comfort zone was absolutely terrifying. But the more I took one step at a time, the more I noticed that tiny steps lead to accomplishments, regardless of how large or small.

• Jobs, careers or titles do not define us. We are all diverse human beings capable of change and renewal, we just need to take charge of ourselves and make the first move.

• Sometimes you just need a little help to press the reset button. For me, it was in the form of a career coach, but for others it may be the support of family and friends, because it’s comforting to make shifts in life or work when someone’s got your back.

Check out our Career Coaching service to find out how we can support you with your own journey out of feeling stuck!